Journal Entry: Thu Mar 21, 2013, 8:47 AM
"My good opinion once lost is lost forever" Mr.Darcy, Pride and Prejudice.
Maybe after everything that's happened since the start of this new year is to cause for the fact this quote has been on my mind so much as of late. Maybe it goes further back to October and September or maybe to last summer... I don't know... But especially lately Mr.Darcy's words have haunted me.
I don't have an exact reasoning why this quote came to mind so abruptly, I haven't picked up Pride and Prejudice in many years, but still it came to mind so clearly.
Maybe it's from the fear that after everything, My Beloved, still belives those words, those wicked lies of an unseen face. After everything I fear that things will end up just like they were before. I know it's stupid to fret over things of the past, I should be happy for the present. Which I am, I'm so happy at times, I think I just may end up taking a leaf out of my sisters book and bounce through the house. But then there are times like now where I just feel like I'm destroying everyones opinion of me, even his.
Maybe it's not so much the late past, but the opinion of a person I'd considered, A Great Confidant. But now I know that's not the case anymore. Everything changed, it had been changing for quite a while... but I feel any good opinion he had of me was destroyed. That I'm no better then any other one of the people who just play people. That'd never been my intention, yet I managed to destroy a friendship that I held dear to my heart.
I don't know anymore...
I guess I just needed to ramble...
Listening to: Arriety's Song (German)
Reading: The Great Gatsby
Watching: Fairy Tail
Drinking: Dr. Pepper